Saturday, July 18, 2009

Splittage

A couple of quick items:

- On the CFL front, how do the Winnipeg Blue Bombers keep sniffing out such abject clowns to take the head coaching reins? Hot on the heels of the cartoonishly hardassed Doug 'Ready, Set, Alienate' Berry (who, incidentally, looks like the type of guy you really wouldn't want to use the bathroom after), this Mike Kelly character has pretty much discredited himself three games into his meagre tenure. It's not like he was exactly bathed in glory (or dignity, for that matter) before the mini-Spygate foofraw due to offseason hijinks, but they even lost to Hamilton! Ha, losers! Oh, uh, wait a minute...

Rapidly changing the subject, I never did get a chance to post my CFL predictions, so am doing the honourary thing and slapping down the picks I made to friends before the regular season kicked off (Montreal is already clearly going to win the East, so I'm chastened from the get-go).

WEST

1) Calgary Stampeders
2) Edmonton Eskimos
3) BC Lions
4) Saskatchewan Roughriders

EAST

1) Toronto Argonauts
2) Montreal Alouettes
3) Winnipeg Blue Bombers
4) Hamilton Tiger-Cats

I also have the fourth-place 'Riders crossing over, as they'll finish higher than the Bombers.

I plan a lengthy state-of-the-Lions blog within the next couple of weeks, but, mercifully, they're off the schneid after a huge victory in Edmonton. More to come, but how glorious are those retro unis? Seriously, the Leos current threads are amongst my favourites in the sports world, but I won't complain if they designate a couple of dates later this season to rock the old-school duds again. In other news, Geroy Simon is god.

Jarious rocking the retros! To American readers, yeah, that same Jarious Jackson.


- Let's just pretend my preseason baseball blog never happened, okay? Cleveland has been a massive disappointment, Florida was schooled by Philly over the past couple of days after somewhat climbing back into the race, the Giants, Tigers, and White Sox are decent, and Trey Hillman ain't winning no trophies.

Sadly, it appears as though my 5th-place Jays prediction is going to come true. For those who don't know, after growing up worshiping the game, I essentially stopped seriously following baseball around the '99 season: the dumbed-down juiced ball era was the biggest culprit, and minor factors were my disillusionment with pro sports in general when the Grizzlies skipped town, combined with the fact that, as a suddenly anti-everything punk kid, my previously crazy sports-fan wattage dimmed a bit, save for the 'Nucks and Lions (happily, I very much returned with little prodding, but MLB continued to take it on the chin until around mid-decade...I regret nothing). That '05 Jays team, starring the O-Dog, a rookie Aaron Hill, and other heroic protagonists brought me back to the game, but nobody was more responsible for my supplicatory return than one Doc Halladay. I actually began planning my schedule around his starts, and, as one who favours the cerebral (yes, I prefer the NL version of baseball, and miss the 'Spos) aspect of the game, flat-out marveled at his ability to gear ground balls based on the particular alignment of his fielders. The power-pitchers get all the ink, but Roy is downright virtuosic in this respect. Of course, his season ended horrifically when Halladay was nailed on the leg by a frozen rope in Arlington, but the damage had been done: Jared was a baseball junkie again.

The function of this preamble is to serve as a warning to ridiculously inept Jays GM J.P. Riccardi. I fully understand that we're rebuilding and, after refusing to accept the notion for a solid week, am willing to accept a Doc trade. This said, if he's dealt to Boston or the Yankees, I'm done with baseball again, and this time for good. The thought of having Halladay come into Toronto to wipe out the Jays three or four times a year while the spoilt fans of the Sox / Bronx Bombers cackle is just too much to bear. I realize, and grudgingly accept, that Toronto has rolled snake-eyes by ending up in the AL East with these twin leviathans, but refuse to have my nose rubbed in it to this extent. The ball's in your court, J.P. Fuck, he's a Massachusetts guy, isn't he?

- Check out Craig Dodge's preseason NFL Powerlines at his always entertaining Vertically Striped Socks blog. I plan on posting my list o'32 within the next two or three weeks as a rebuttal: there's a fair amount of common ground, but, as a sneak preview, I have issues with his placement of the Chargers and Cardinals (should be lower), plus the Bears and Seahawks (should be higher).